


i will love you until you learn to love yourself

by Bumble_Bee_Be



Series: Tumblr Oneshots [12]
Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: Author Is Sleep Deprived, F/M, I Don't Even Know, Pray for me, The Author Regrets Everything, Tumblr Prompt, cause yeah, i love how that's a tag, jade's sad, never written this ship, this is basically just fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:55:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27857185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bumble_Bee_Be/pseuds/Bumble_Bee_Be
Summary: Something is bothering Jade and Beck wants to know what.
Relationships: Beck Oliver/Jade West
Series: Tumblr Oneshots [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2015566
Comments: 7
Kudos: 63





	i will love you until you learn to love yourself

**Author's Note:**

  * For [falliamficsreader](https://archiveofourown.org/users/falliamficsreader/gifts).



> Prompt - Bade: 3, 4, 7, 8, 16, 19
> 
> also I'm sorry these are taking so long school is a bitch and I have other projects too, but i'm doing my best!!!
> 
> GUYS THIS IS IMPORTANT PLEASE READ IT'S A TW
> 
> TW: there's a reference to mild child abuse at the end there, it's just one hit that's described but it's there and yeah, please don't read if that might trigger you because that is the absolute last thing I want to do <3

Beck’s been worried about Jade all day. It’s not anything in particular. If you asked him why, he couldn’t tell you. It would consist of too much stammering and talking in circles and frustrated sighs as he tried to explain. And it would end with him letting out an exasperated, “Nothing, nevermind,” and walking away or simply changing the topic.

But still. He’s worried. Jade isn’t  _ talking _ to him. But he knows her well enough by now to know when something’s wrong. And something is  _ definitely _ wrong. Jade doesn’t exactly talk to people, but she always has to Beck. Maybe not directly, but after knowing her for five years and dating her for two, Beck knows her almost better than himself.

It’s been going on all day. Maybe longer, but today he’s been noticing. Noticing the lack of snide remarks from his snippy girlfriend. The unusual absence of claiming hands around his waist or marks on his neck or possessive kisses stolen whenever she gets the chance. Jade loves to remind people that Beck is  _ hers _ and Beck finds her adorable and as such indulges her as much as she wants. Which is why he knows something is extremely off when she’s all but ignoring his very existence. Ignoring everyone’s existence, really. She hasn’t said a word to Andre or Cat, and all she says at all are venomous snaps at Tori, Rex, or Robbie. They all just shrug it off. 

“Jade’s in a mood.”

“Guess it’s just one of  _ those _ days.”

“When is she  _ not _ rude to us?”

Beck knows better. He knows she loves Cat more than she’s willing to ever admit, enjoys the banter with Tori. Jade isn’t very good at showing affection, especially with anyone that’s not, well, Beck. 

When they met the first year of middle school, neither of them knew just how much they would grow to need each other. Jade was  _ angry _ . All the time. She was angry at her parents for being horrible, angry at herself for not being enough. Angry at the world. So she would lash out, snapping at random kids until they cried, glaring people down until they were practically shaking. Even at twelve, Jade was terrifying. 

Beck was immediately drawn to her. He couldn’t explain it then and still can’t. Something about this angry girl with the beautiful, broken eyes called to him. When she turned, feeling eyes on the back of her neck in Mrs. Gerisson’s 7th grade English class, and saw Beck staring at her with a cool, steady gaze, she instantly scowled, glaring daggers. The corners of Beck’s lips quirked up, amused, and Jade’s glower darkened, flipping him a sly middle finger and facing forward. 

“Why do you keep staring at me?” she had demanded, marching up to him at his locker. Beck turned to her, grinning a little. He shrugged, putting away his book and shutting the locker.

“I think you’re interesting,” he answered simply. Jade frowned.

“Well, stop it,” she ordered.

“No.”

“ _ No _ ?” Jade echoed, eyebrows raised. Beck shrugged, leaning against the locker and fixing her with a steady gaze.

“No.” Jade scowled, kicked him in the shin, and stalked away. And if she smiled a little at his quiet laugh, well that’s no one’s business but her own.

Pretty soon, they were friends. Jade found that instead of annoying her like most people did, Beck’s unfazeable and genuine persona was one she enjoyed. He didn’t bullshit her or treat her like she was broken. He treated her the way he’d treat anyone, called her out when she was being a brat, laughed quietly at her snide remarks and rude comments. 

Beck was Jade’s first real friend. It took them three years to realize that they were far more than friends. 

They were at a party and Jade was drinking too much. Beck could tell. As the night went on, Jade grew angrier and angrier, her mood consistently darkening.

“Ooh look!” Cat, a member of the group they now had, squealed, jumping and pointing, tugging at Jade’s sleeve. “There’s cupcakes!!! I wanna cupcake!”

“Then go and get a cupcake,” Jade replied sharply, taking a sip of her drink. Beck and Cat both frowned at her, Cat mildly hurt and Beck growing more concerned by the minute. 

“Well, will you come with me?” Cat asked, batting her eyelashes and giving her best puppy dog eyes.

“Cat you can get your own goddamned cupcake!” Jade snapped angrily, glaring at the sweet redhead. Tears welled in Cat’s eyes, but then Robbie was there, wrapping an arm around her and tugging her away gently.

“C’mon KitCat, let’s get you a cupcake.” Cat watched Jade with sad eyes as Robbie led her away. As soon as they were out of earshot, Beck turned to Jade.

“Why’re you being like this?” he demanded, gaze locked on her face as she refused to meet his eyes. She took a drink from her cup.

“Like what?”

“Bitchy.” She glared at him. 

“That’s my default, remember?”

“Not like this. Usually you’re funny-bitchy. Now you’re just being mean,” Beck argued, not backing down. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m  _ fine _ , Beck,” Jade snapped, glaring at him.

“I don’t think you are.”

“Well I am. So drop it.”

“No.”

“I’m fine!”

“Stop telling me you’re ok!” Beck demanded, eyes flashing, reaching out for her. “Tell me what’s going on, Jade.”

“Don’t touch me,” she ordered. 

“Then tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“You’re lying,” he accused.

“I’m not.”

“Yes you are.” Jade rolled her eyes, moving to walk away. Beck caught her with a hand on her elbow, eyes burning into hers. “Why?” 

“I’m not-”

“ _ Why _ , Jade?” Beck demanded, gaze locked onto hers, holding her in place.

“Beck, just drop it,” Jade asked, her voice uncharacteristically small. And- were those  _ tears _ ? Something was so  _ so _ wrong.

“Tell me,” he insisted, resolve unwavering.

“Because!” Jade cried, finally snapping as she threw her cup aside, eyes burning with tears.

“Because  _ why _ ?”

“Because no one cares about me!” 

“What?” Beck asked, softening, voice gentle and cautious. 

“No one  _ cares _ , Beck. Not about me. So why should I?”

“For fuck’s sake, Jade,” Beck sighed, raking a hand back through his hair, releasing his best friend.

“Just leave me alone,” Jade whispered, turning to leave. Instantly, Beck’s hand shot out, grabbing her wrist and yanking her back to him, lips diving down to meet hers before she had a chance to say a word. A gentle hand was on her jaw, tipping it so he could kiss her soundly, lips soft and insistent on hers. He pulled back after a second, fingers still on her chin. Jade looked up at him, eyes wide and dazed. 

“Wha-”

“ _ I _ care, Jade,” Beck whispered, eyes boring deep into hers. “Let me.”

“Ok,” she replied, and then he pulled her into a tight hug. She let him. 

They’ve been dating ever since. 

So yeah, Beck’s pretty good at reading Jade by now. So when she stands up and promptly runs out of Sikowitz’s class with no explanation, Beck  _ knows _ something’s not right. Without a word, he’s out of his seat and chasing after her, sparing only a second to shake his head when their other friends move to come. Beck jogs through the halls. He knows where Jade is already.

Coming to a stop in front of the janitor’s closet, Beck lightly raps his fingers on the wood, itching to open the door but giving her the chance to let him in herself.

“Jade? Babe, I know you’re in there,” he calls.

“Go  _ away _ , Beck!” she yells from inside. Beck sighs. Well, he’s obviously not going to do that. He twists the doorknob, pushing open the door. Jade doesn’t even look back at him from her precarious perch on top of stacked crates and boxes, shaking and tugging at the vent covering above her head. Beck sighs, walking up behind her and reaching a hand to her waist. She shoots him a venomous glare over her shoulder. “I told you to  _ go away _ .”

“Since when do I listen to you?”

“Fuck off, Beck.” She turns her attention back to jerking at the vent, but not before Beck sees tears shining in her eyes. Ok  _ what _ is going on?

“Jade, c’mon,” Beck sighs, pulling lightly at her hip. A combat boot comes back to kick him but he shifts, avoiding the blow. “Stop doing that, you’ll hurt yourself.”

“And?”

“And I’d much rather that not happen.” Jade turns to glare at him again, eyes sharp and cutting and shining with unshed tears.

“Why?” Her voice is meeker than Beck is used to, and it just concerns him more.

“Because I love you, dumbass,” he grumbles, gripping both sides of her waist and lifting her down despite her small sound of protest. She shoves at him but he doesn’t budge, pulling her closer to his chest and wrapping his arms around her, trapping her hands between their bodies. It takes several long moments, but she eventually stops struggling against him, sinking into the hold instead as he pets her hair. 

“Why?” she asks again, barely audible.

“Hmm?” Beck pulls away a little to look down at her. Wide glassy blue eyes meet his. 

“Why do you love me?”

“How much time you got?” He brushes stray hairs away, tucking them behind her ear and smiling softly. 

“No, really Beck. Why do you think I’m worth loving?” she repeats, searching his eyes as if there were an answer she could pull from them.

“Why are you asking me this?”

“Why aren’t you answering?” Jade counters. Beck sighs, letting out a soft chuckle and cupping her face in his hands, resting their foreheads together and looking right into her eyes.

“Because it’s an impossible question. You are the strongest, toughest, most beautiful, badass, incredible person I know. Why wouldn’t I love you?” Jade sniffs, dropping her gaze down.

“No one else does.”

“That’s shit. Cat loves you.” Jade lets out a tearful chuckle. “Andre loves you. Shit, even Tori loves you, Jade. You’re incredible.” Beck ducks his head down, lips meeting hers in a soft kiss that she returns, if somewhat hesitantly. When he pulls back, there are tears on her cheeks. His thumbs come up to swipe them away and she smiles sadly, leaning into the touch. “Wanna tell me what’s going on now?” Jade takes a shaky breath.

“It’s my dad,” she whispers, not looking at him. Something ugly and angry twists in Beck’s chest. He hates Jade’s parents. _Especially_ her dad. He’s a disgusting asshole and she should’ve left him a long time ago, like her mom did as soon as she hit high school. Beck’s offered to let her move in before, but she always insisted she was fine and could handle it.

“What’d they do this time?” Jade swallows hard, blinking as she avoids his gaze. Beck tugs her to sit next to him on a crate, hugging her still as she leans into his chest, arms around his waist.

“He uh- he…” Beck tenses, preparing himself for whatever’s coming. “He hit me.” Beck’s blood turns to ice, his grip tightening as he clenches his jaw tightly.

“He  _ what _ ?” Beck demands, voice low and dark. Jade sniffs and he rubs her back gently. Anger can come later. Right now he needs to take care of Jade.

“It- he- we were arguing and then he just slapped me,” Jade explains, breath hitching. “It wasn’t like- it wasn’t hard but… anyway he called me in class and I just kind of panicked.”

“Fuck,” Beck whispers, dropping a kiss to the top of her head. He moves, taking her face in his hands and peppering kisses over her face- her cheeks, eyelids, the tip of her nose. He rests his forehead against hers as her hands come up to hold his wrists lightly. “You’re not going back there. We’ll get your stuff when he’s not there and you’ll move in with me.” He’s ready to fight her on this, because there is no way in hell he lets her go back there now.

“Ok,” she agrees softly. Blue eyes, earnest and loving and still  _ so sad _ , rise to his. “I love you.” Beck can’t help but smile a little. 

“I love you, too. We’re gonna figure this out.” Jade just hums agreeingly and presses her lips to his, arms wrapping around his neck. 

“Together,” she whispers against his lips.

“As if I could get rid of you now,” he jokes lightly, knowing Jade’ll want the heaviness to lift, won’t want to linker. Jade just glares at him in that cold, judging way she has and stands up, rolling her eyes.

“Wow, ok, I see how it is,” she teases, moving as if to leave. With a hand on her waist, Beck pulls her back between his legs, drawing her, smirking, down into a kiss. 

“Guys!” Cat’s voice sing-songs as the door opens. She catches sight of them and lets out a squeak, hand flying over her eyes. Beck laughs quietly and Jade steps back slightly, rolling her eyes. 

“It’s safe now Kitty Cat,” Jade hums, raising an eyebrow. “You can open your eyes.”

“Sikowitz wants you back in class,” Cat informs them squeakily, eyes still covered. Jade rolls her eyes again and Beck grins. 

“Ok, well-”

“Cat!” Robbie calls, cutting Jade off as he slips in beside Cat. “Guys, Sikowitz really wants us all back in class.”

“Yeah, Cat just-”

“What’re we all doing?” Andre asks as he and Tori squeeze into the closet. Jade groans.

“Really?” she asks, appearing irritated now. Beck knows she loves it, loves their friends in all their hectic chaos.

“They were kissing!” Cat accuses, hand still over her eyes as she points at a mop beside Jade.

“I don’t even know how that would work and I do  _ not _ wanna find out,” Rex pipes up. The entire group does a collective eyeroll at his idiotic joke and Cat frowns, hand moving from her face. 

“Not the mop,” she explains, pointing at Beck and Jade. “ _ Them _ !” Andre grins, wrapping an arm around Cat and leading her from the closet.

“Yeah, they’ll do that,” he says as they leave, winking at Beck. Robbie jogs after them, already making another stupid joke that leaves Cat giggling.

“You guys coming?” Tori asks as she turns to leave. Beck looks to Jade and she rolls her eyes, reaching out a hand, taking Beck’s and pulling him up and past Tori, out the door. Jade glances over her shoulder as they walk away, smirking at Tori.

“You coming?” she mocks. Tori sighs and walks after them, even as she lets a small grin slip. Beck rolls his eyes, shaking his head and squeezing Jade’s hand as she calls some insult up ahead to Robbie.

He knows they’ve got a lot to figure out, especially with what she just told him and the fact that there’s no way in hell he’s going to let her keep living with her dick of a dad, but they'll manage. They always do, once Jade lets him in. It’s much better than the withdraw, quiet, sullen Jade when she shuts him out.

“Yeah well Rex might have a hand up his ass, but you’ve got a stick up yours,” Jade tells Robbie as the round the corner, walking as an amorphous blob through the halls. Beck grins, shaking his head and looking at Jade fondly.

Yeah, he’s glad to have his Jade back. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it!!! Never written them before but I love them and they are the cause of my gay panic so here you go.


End file.
